this is a great post, it highlights so much of what can go wrong, and something we dont often talk about, how the win “definition” cna change your view on your work and/or future wins.
My advice, and i work for a group of casinos so please at least read some of this, i might ramble a bit too much though – I see this a lot. Ive done it myself. My first hit, like yours, was first place for $6k on Pokerstars in 2008. I then played poker for a job, and won $65.7k in 2009, and another $10k hit in the same month. You get the feeling of indestructibility. You see 65.7k on a screen and think – well i can cashout 60k and have fun with 5.7k. Problem is that is FIVE thousands euros. Thats half a years wages for your average 21 year old.
So things go south and you are always chasing the next hit. The stakes rise. The deposit size rises. The deposit frequency rises. Its a vicious circle. Five years ago casinos preyed on this, these players, no matter the level of responsible gaming a casino has, make up a majority of the player database. I look through the back offices of casinos we manage and I see people depositing 25, then 50, then 150, then 325, then locking their account for a bit. But they come back. Dont get me wrong, the main income for a casino is VIP players, thats why they look after them so well, but the main issue in gambling is those with no control, or those with no sense of “stopping”.
What im trying to say, in a weird way, is you can only do what you want to do. If you earn 1k a month, you need to start afresh from right now. You have 1k a month. Forget what you had, or could have had, and think of your life. Think of your wife, and what it would be like if she hated you. There arent that many lovely women in the world who would have sex with you and marry you i assume. Unless you look like Ryan Reynolds in which fuck your way to the top it seems easier 🙂 As for you being lucky, thats not something anyone can prove, and luck runs out. Noone is lucky forever.
You need to assign some context to your decisions. Losing from 12k to 2k happens. More than you know. Yesterday I saw someone request 65k in cashouts. Today i checked and they have reversed 35k of it. Its greed and addiction. And it sucks. It pains me to see it. Dont be a figure on a screen, as even if you win 50k tomorrow from 5 euros deposit, you will lose it back in the end. Invest in something that causes you joy, that will make you not hate life if you cant gamble. Find something better to define who you are.
