Are you ever cured?

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  • #79825
    bradurrrrz WANTED $3
    Outlaw

    I have been gamble free a while now. I’m 30 and only gamble free as I have passed all my income and banks and passwords over to my mother – who at 62 has better things to worry about.

    It was the only way I could stop myself and the damage I was doing.

    But she asked me this week, when do I feel that I’ll be ready to take back control of my money myself?

    And my answer was never.

    I am 30 I’m a grown man I have kids, I know fully well what chance I have of winning. But moreso I know what I am capable of. I know at the flick of a switch I am all in and I can’t control it.

    That urge. That uncontrollable urge I still feel it. I gambled often but not every day. But when I did it was uncontrollable. It was a monster taking over my mind.

    I want to know. Do you think you can ever be cured? Or is this a battle that we face every day.

    The ups and downs of gambling were my darkest days and my most glorious days. Life without it is just life. I was told “you either accept who you are and limit the damage, or fight every day to be someone you aren’t” … and that makes a lot of sense

     

    #79826
    WES1970 WANTED $14
    Outlaw

    bradurrrrz wrote:

    I have been gamble free a while now. I’m 30 and only gamble free as I have passed all my income and banks and passwords over to my mother – who at 62 has better things to worry about.

    It was the only way I could stop myself and the damage I was doing.

    But she asked me this week, when do I feel that I’ll be ready to take back control of my money myself?

    And my answer was never.

    I am 30 I’m a grown man I have kids, I know fully well what chance I have of winning. But moreso I know what I am capable of. I know at the flick of a switch I am all in and I can’t control it.

    That urge. That uncontrollable urge I still feel it. I gambled often but not every day. But when I did it was uncontrollable. It was a monster taking over my mind.

    I want to know. Do you think you can ever be cured? Or is this a battle that we face every day.

    The ups and downs of gambling were my darkest days and my most glorious days. Life without it is just life. I was told “you either accept who you are and limit the damage, or fight every day to be someone you aren’t” … and that makes a lot of sense

     

    First things first well done for understanding what gambling was doing you have done really well,from my perspective and personal experience no that feeling never goes away the urge is always there it’s like all addictions ie alcoholics you either stop and never drink again because the first time you touch a drop your right back to square one(ex alcoholic myself).

    Instead of your mother having that responsibility have you not thought of signing up to gamstop for say 5 years and see how that goes maybe then you urges may have gone away?

    Its one of the hardest addictions to overcome in my experience,what I found helpful was to take up a hobby and spend more quality time with my family any way keep up the good work.

    It also helps talking to people who are going/have gone through what your your dealing with this forum is a good place to start and there is also gamblers anonymous.

    #79839
    Haz40 WANTED $1,059
    Outlaw

    Sounds like your doing the right thing now. Personally i don’t think we are ever cured but like many things it will get easier. I’m currently 95 days without any online gambling or betting and each day is starting to become the norm. I still get urges of course but the thought of ruining over 3 months of good work certainly deters you from having a session. There was a time where everywhere i went i would carry little cash as possible. No bank cards no access to online gambling but now i take my card wherever i go. I finally feel i some control but i know I’m not cured and still must be careful in my thoughts and actions. It will get easier i promise but it will always stay in the back of your mind. Good luck.

    #79842
    Seyahkram1977 WANTED $40
    Outlaw

    I don’t think you can really….. gambling is like smoking or losing weight, there will be one or two nice stories but over all the battle is to steep….

    one of the things I ask people is, when in exclusion what have you done to try and deal with the issues that need you to exclude your self to a gamstop level, or to get family members involved? And not just  bank stuff, in your head stuff…

    most people tend to just wait the clock out, but not really get to grips with it, Believing  time will sort their issues out and then bang, one year later , cured ….when in fact that addictive side just sits behind them quietly, and one bad day it pounces and the whole wheel restarts….

    On this forum you’ll hear a lot of ex gamblers and gamblers give advice and help people through these issues, and talking is always good, this is meant to be a community and you need to feel like you can talk in here, for every one person expressing a feeling, 10 have gone through it ….but the one thing you hear over and over again is “ extend you exclusion “ And in your comment you obviously know that the vibe is you can’t control your self….but you do need to get hold of this because your mother isn’t always going to be around or able to deal with it ( sorry, sounds dark , but you have kids and that reality is important thing to focus on  )

    But there are thing you can look into, Doctors can issues a few session with therapist for free, getting an account that doesn’t have a card, getting a card delivered to a family member and have them scratching the three digits on the back off, your bank has the ability to block spending on gambling sites…. it’s never a lost cause….there are many people on here who have done well….so can people be “cured “ on a whole I don’t think they can, but there are some …and perhaps trying to cut that part of your life out is easier than trying to balance with it ….

    but take the positives that you’ve got to this point and your dealing with it ….. taht is a big step on its own

     

Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)